Writing Erotica 3: Gendered Anatomy (Fight Heteronormativity)

I ran into a fic today that more or less tickled me pink.
Let me explain.

While I personally loath the practice of personifying genitalia, it does seem to be somewhat common. In particular the urge to engender one’s anatomy with the pronouns ‘She’ or ‘He’. Generally speaking, vagina’s are personified as female, and penis’s as male. I suppose this seems fairly straightforward (and thus to my mind, boring).
The fic in question turned this on its head by having one of the main characters refer to his cock as ‘she’.
Edit: Another instance of this phenomena occurs in the film Pitch Perfect. In the film, the character Stacy refers to her vagina as a “he”. Her self satisfied smirk is amazing. Go watch it!!
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The importance of Trigger warnings in books and Fanfiction.

I don’t know if I can accurately portray just how important it is for authors to include trigger warnings in their work. But let me put it like this; the feeling of revulsion and renewed trauma experienced by the triggering reader can go on for days and weeks, it essentially reopens their original wounds, cuts into their slowly healing soul and gouges out sections of their mind and sanity. It is the equivalent of mental torture, and authors need to be aware that their words have barbs.

I don’t think some authors realize just how badly their words can hurt. How deeply they can cut. The trauma of rape is something that never leaves but is slowly scarred over. Triggering causes the wound to burst open, bleeding freely and poisoning the mind until nothing but harsh images and hurt spiral out of control.

If memories are boxes in the houses of our mind, triggers cause those boxes to explode. Violently. Infecting everything else. Shrapnel cutting into the foundations and shaking the walls like an earthquake.

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Writing Erotica 2 – Vagina Terminology

I’m sort of abstractly peeved that I wrote the penis post before I wrote this one. In a way it just seems like I was totally buying into the dick pervasiveness in society..

Note: In the anatomy section, I do refer to the Vagina as part of the ‘female reproductive organs,’ however Vagina’s are NOT solely female as the world is exciting and filled with all types of people.

Both Men and Women can have Vaginas, So please Use this Writing Erotica guide for your Vagina-equipped characters.

Anyway, let’s get to the meat of it!

Warning: This is NSFW and there is an image of a VAGINA after the jump!!! (Run in fear)

This is NOT supposed to be a guide about using language in society, this is a reference for erotic writing and getting readers in the mood.

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Writing Erotica 1 – Phallus Terminology

In literature, life, and of course fanfiction, there is the endless debate over what words to use to describe objects that continually show up on the same page or in the same paragraph. For instance you might call your character Sam – if that is his name – or Victor, Mr. Henshaw, the poet, the soccer star, the blonde, the brunette, the dashing rogue, Vickie, Vinny, or Vivian.

However it is the debate over something much more awkward that is our topic of conversation today.

What exactly do you call a penis?

Note: I read a lot of erotica, or as I like to call it – porn. I read porn. A LOT of porn. I have been reading porn for around ten years, or there abouts, and thus can discuss it with some vague faux credibility.

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Ennui and Ann

Having another episode of ennui, I suppose thats the only real word I can find to describe it.

I woke up at 9, intending to go back to work on my …well work. Instead I have spent hours reading random things and feeling paralyzed by ….ennui.

I started reading about various forms of depression, but I can’t find anything that fits what I experience. I have some form of depression and take some meds for it, but these episodes are weird. Its like my brain is suddenly so stuffed that I can’t function. That the words become so muddled that they are no longer words and are just… grey. Its not like the fog I usually experience, at least I don’t think so. My periods of ‘ennui’ are more notable in my inability to move or do anything. Its like I’m trapped in my body and I’m telling it to move and I still won’t do it.
But I don’t feel hopeless, a symptom that is mentioned a lot in the articles I read. I don’t have low self esteem. I’m just..

Its like I’m being crushed by the sheer amount of choices and actions out there. So much that its easier to just not move at all. To just let it happen and let the time pass. Do nothing. Simply. Stop. Being. Here.

These periods are generally …. I spend time just staring into space, part of me trying to force myself to get up and do something goddammit, part of me feeling like everything is too much effort, too much input, too much action and information. Too many choices. I had that problem as a child actually, I had problems with creative writing because I was paralyzed into inaction by the infinite amount of choices I could make. A story is like a blank slate and I couldn’t make the choice to go anywhere, so I stayed where I was, completely overwhelmed into mental molasses. Its like my brain is stalling. Like when your computer refuses to work fast because its trying to do all these other activities.

I keep having ‘could’ thoughts.

I’m a little worried this may be a side effect of one of my meds. I take Lyrica and while I’m prescribed 1-3 tablets, if I take more than one my brain function slows to the point where I can’t read a single sentence and comprehend it. Its like my attention span is that of a goldfish. Its scary as hell because I can’t finish a single sentence, in my own head! It scares the hell out of me and I wonder if perhaps these periods of ennui are somehow related.
Or maybe its related to my sleep patterns. I have a very very very fubar internal clock. I get up at different times pretty much everyday. I can sleep from 6 hours to 20 with no real rhyme or reason to it. Perhaps my brain isn’t getting the amount of time it needs to settle everything in and instead decides to stall my brain into inactivity when I’m awake.

I wonder if you can feel your muscles atrophy. If I don’t move from this position, will I be able to feel it? Its odd, if I have an itch I’ll move to scratch it instinctually, but anything that requires decision making makes me stall and remain paralyzed in the moment.

I should meditate. I think it would help a lot.

Writing this up has helped quite a bit too.